10,000 BC The Legend. The Battle. The First Hero.

Old historians always wondered how the Egyptians of the past built the pyramids. Indeed, one of the greatest mysteries of our civilization. Roland Emmerich (Director of Independence Day and The Day After Tomorrow) has solved this thing out for all of us. Funny how they needed mammoths to help them. What are these? M-a-m-m-o-t-h-s; kind of like huge, furry mules looking like elephants (whatever!).

Anyway, 10,000 BC is the epic of D’Leh (gorgeous actor, Steven Strait), a young mammoth hunter in the snowy mountains. He and his tribe are in trouble as some of their people are disappearing. He falls in love with Evolet (beautiful Camilla Belle), a uniquely blue-eyed girl his tribe adopts after her family is killed. Nobody had another eye color in the movie except her (worst blue contacts though!). Can’t they just take a naturally blue-eyed actress? When Evolet and a few others are kidnapped by a band of warlords, D’Leh, his mentor Tic Tic (Cliff Curtis)…yes, a grown man named Tic Tic, and D’Leh’s young “sidekick” Baku (Nathaneal Baring) cross the world to save them. Along the way they must fight “ugly terror birds”, saber tooth tigers, and elements of all unimaginable kinds. They are joined by other tribes who have lost people to the slave raiders, and together they march on to “Egypt” to free their people from a tyrannical god (I think he is gay!)…

Some questions I had in mind was that how this ancient man, (with his sexy dirty dread locks) can cross snowy mountains, lush grasslands, and the deserts of Egypt, with little food and water, and have a perfectly groomed goatee? Hushhh… Hushhh…

The performances were great in my opinion. With the loss of Heath Ledger, I say Steven Strait is someone to watch. Believe it. He had to lose 30 lbs of muscle for his role.

I enjoyed the movie despite all the reviews I have read before actually buying the 70-peso pink ticket (not to mention my cheeseburger meal!). I wouldn’t want to expect historical accuracy. I totally get that 10,000 BC isn’t when the pyramids were built. I get that it’s a appropriate number rather than use 2267 BC which may sound itchy as a movie title. I love epic stories about love and heroes. Who cares…