Rebuild Your Relationship – Mom and Daughter

For Daughters:

See mom as a person. Get to know your her and her life better to help you understand her behaviors and develop more patience.

Shift usual relatioship patterns. Feel like you are 15 again when mom is around? There are specific things she says or does that push your buttons. Step back and be calm. Talk about things that bother you in a loving and respectful way.

Take charge of the relationship. Take initiative on what you would like to change in your relationship with her. Share an activity together.

Know when to seek help. If your relationship with her si very toxic, consider finding a supportive friend to help you heal and decide how to handle your relationship with her.

For Moms:

Do not criticize. You may feel that you are helping but you are just making your daughter feel hurt and awful. See them as competent adults.

Listen hard. Listen to your daughter. Avoid giving too much advice as the best decision is as to her. Help her form her solutions instead.

Allow breathing room. Let her decide. Let her commit her own mistake and find her way through tough situations. Just make sure she knows that you are supportive.

Draw from your own experiences. Think about what you have liked your own mother to have said or done differently and try to do these things to your daughter.